Are you a wallflower that wants to become a social butterfly? We offer some advice.

Your social aptitude could quite possibly be the most important skill you possess. These skills need to be sharp all the time, whether you are at work, at play, or going about your daily activities and errands. Coworkers, friends, strangers, and the people that service you can all form an opinion about you from the way you speak and act.

Although it's a highly desired ability, the majority of people may not possess it. Surveys show that public speaking tops many people's list of fears. So, if you struggle with social settings, feel nervous speaking publicly, or have trouble meeting new people, there's nothing wrong with you. You aren't alone.

You may envy the social butterflies, who can speak with a silver tongue and dazzle a captive audience. However, being successful in social situations doesn't necessarily have anything to do with speaking. Becoming the kind of person that everyone wants to be around doesn't have to be complicated; there are myriad ways to make yourself more socially successful.

Be Approachable

Making yourself approachable really comes down to two important elements – body language and facial expression. People are going to form an opinion about you, and decide if they want to approach you before you even say a word. So, it is essential to emit a positive vibe.

Body Language

Next time you're at a social gathering, take a moment to reflect on what your body language is saying to others. The way you stand can send a message to other guests. If you want to send a warm, approachable message, your body language should reflect that desire. This means standing and mingling with others, not off on your own, with your arms crossed across your chest.

If you're part of the action, people are more likely to involve you in their conversations. Even if you aren't comfortable, you don't have to appear that way. Attain a relaxed, open stance that welcomes other people into your space.

Facial Expressions

Your face is the gateway to how you feel and it is the first thing people are going to notice. A friendly smile, a warm laugh, and eye contact are fundamental. This tells others that you are someone who is enjoyable to talk to and fun to be around.

Know Your Strengths

It's always helpful if you have a good understanding of your interpersonal strengths and look for ways that you can maximize them. Perhaps you have a great sense of humour, or you're a good storyteller. You can make a positive impact on other people through your strong points.

Be a Good Listener

Listen more, speak less, and show respect. Active listening is a skill. It involves maintaining eye contact and nodding in acknowledgement as you listen. It is important that you give the speaker signs that you are interested in what he or she is saying. This gives that person the confidence to keep talking.

You must also acknowledge that you understand what the person is trying to communicate. Try repeating or rephrasing the point that he or she is trying to make. It helps the speaker know that you are listening and more importantly, understanding them.

Respond to the Speaker

To keep a conversation flowing, make sure to ask exploratory questions. They are not questions that yield a yes or no response. Rather, they are open-ended and prompt the other person to elaborate. Use one of these examples: "Can you describe what it's like?"; "How do you feel about that?"; "What is your opinion on...?" These types of questions can provide further insight into the topic and allow a natural progression to a new topic.

Also practice responding with your own thoughts and opinions, after you have taken the time to understand the speaker's perspective. People won't be interested in a nodding bobble head. They want to know that you are capable of forming your own thoughts and ideas.

Mingle

Although it may put you at ease, avoid clustering in a small group with your friends and people that you already know. You won't gain the confidence to mingle with new people if you always stick to the same crowd.

Instead, make the rounds and introduce yourself to people you don't know and initiate friendly conversations. The more you do this, the easier it will become.

Dress for the Occasion

Yeah, it sound superficial, but how you dress is projecting an impression on others. And, if you dress appropriately for the occasion and fit in with others, you will feel more comfortable. Dressing for social success means that you show up in attire that is suitable to the situation.

To ensure that you are dressing fittingly for an event, you can call other people and ask what they're wearing.

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be yourself

Becoming confident in social situations requires practice. Rehearse in environments where you are already comfortable. This can be achieved in the workplace, and amongst friends and family. This will prepare you for any social setting.

Once you are prepared, you will feel confident. When you're confident, you will feel comfortable. And when you are comfortable, you're more likely to be yourself.